For the win: for the KILL! Product review

Okay, I'm cutting to the chase here with the fastest KILL I've found for arachnos here in the UK. Because at this time of year, that's what you need!

S-words whited out below, just in case they help anyone find this post:

fastest spider killer, that quickly kills spiders within seconds, independent review of fastest spider killer, possibly the most humane spider killl, so if you have spider here's how to make them a fucking guestlist pass to spider heaven.

Okay: fastest knock-down and humane kill for arachnos, has to be, Bayer Garden "Organic Pest Control" pump-action spray.

I have NOTHING to do with this company, and find their links to vivisection absolutely appalling by the way.

But I'm just talking about what works here for arachnophobes, and if you're one, you'll appreciate maybe that principles can best be debated when you're not terrified. If you care, PLEASE go send some money to the legal and non-violent British Union Against Vivisection, or any other organisations who support ending cruelty to animals.

We're here to get rid of arachnos, and I make no apologies for buying this one product by them.

This puppy (Bayer website link with no nasty pics) is described as - "Organic, ready to use contact insect control." The page FAQ on Bayer's site for this product then rather bizarrely goes on about something called Cat-A-Pult, a cat repellent, I put that down to the web designer accidentally breathing in their products lol... anyway you can buy it in most garden centres.

Basically, £5 or so buys you a chunky 1 litre blue pump action spray of fatty acids in solution, which if you know your enemy you'll know she breathes through things called "book lungs" modifed into tubular tracheae in most species (yeah, I don't get it either) and they branch out, and open through her entire body into her outsides.

My theory (as a moron) is this stuff has fats in solution, so it's like, I could be drowned in water and come up gasping for air, but drown me in olive oil (liquid fats) and I'm fucked - to use a technical term...

Whatever, this stuff knocks 'em down fast - I had a runner the size (legs included) of my palm earlier, ran into the bathroom, I caught her 12 - 18 good squirts with this stuff, and found her stalled and dead as a doornail by my sink.

Downside? yes, there is one from the user point of view. It's fats in solution, so don't spray it on granny's antique silk wedding gown, and it'll fuck up your wallpaper, and stain most emulsion paint. Bayer will sort you out with other instructions and cautions, although it is an organic approved product - like most insecticides, it's particularly dangerous to fish, so bear that in mind right now.

And it won't repel arachnos as a barrier - I suspect those bastards (who taste through their FEET - what kind of "fuck you" is that to the world?!) will happily run past a barrier of this stuff - nonetheless I found it to be a reliably good contact killer for even the biggest UK arachnos, and having had to score one eight-legged soul tonight, posting it up for my fellow travellers.

Oh, and its precursor was called "Baby Bio Organic Houseplant Insecticide" and I used that reliably for years too and for me, I'd rather clean up the stains than deal with having a live one in my home.

So posting this up first as using this stuff wasn't even on the menu when I was a kid and jumping at every shadow, we relied on permethrin (pyrethrum, etc, all the same basic principle) sprays, which attack the nervous system (ouch!) and basically make your arachno act like it's whiffed up some PCP before it dies, and is NOT humane, imo - though I would use it given no other choices.

Anyway - Bayer Organic Pest Control for the win, and God bless sister arachno, may she reincarnate FARRR from my front door.